Unpleasant Encounter With A Family Member

Maulana Wahiduddin Khan |  The Times of India Delhi  | October 27, 2016


Our life is full of connections through which we come to grips with the negative or positive aspects of life. So we have to be very circumspect about availing opportunities afforded by natural relationships formed in the course of our existence.

For example, your family is your first frame of reference. It is your family members with whom you spend your days and nights. You have various experiences with them, sometimes sweet and sometimes bitter. In this sense, your family is the most important part of your social environment.

You should avail of every kind of lesson that you receive from your family .If you find that certain happenings in your family are undesirable, you have to be tolerant on such occasions. You have to appreciate how even in your family circle the tenor of life cannot always be free of unwanted situations. If you find that at such times you cannot show any tolerance, you are going to find life very difficult outside the family circle when you enter society at large and encounter all kinds of unpleasantness.

So, you have to accept that unpleasant experiences are an inescapable part of life. And you have to be capable of adopting a give-and-take attitude within the family circle as well as outside in society .

Your family is not just your family: it is also a source of training for you. In this sense, your family serves as the cradle for your future career. If your school is a source of formal education for you, then your family is a source of informal education.And both are equally important.

For example, if you have an unfortunate encounter with a family member, don't take it as an evil. Take it as a first, very necessary training lesson, because you are destined one day to go out of your home and live in society . And in society there will be many occasions on which you will have similar negative experiences. You must realise that your family is a blessing for you, for it is like a training centre that sends you out into society as a prepared or mature person.Indeed, your family is the mainspring of your future life.

Everyone knows that formal education is very important for his future, to get a good job. I do agree with this point of view, but in terms of one's all-round existence, education is not the be-all and end-all of everything. For a better quality of life you need something more ­ and that is informal education. Everyone's family is the centre of informal education for him. To gain admission into this institution, you don't need to pay any kind of admission fee. It is destined by nature and by birth.You should therefore make certain to avail of whatever your family offers you in terms of informal education.

The family is a unit of society . In this sense, every family is like a minisociety . You have to try to train yourself in this mini-society so that you will be able to enjoy a better life in the larger society . One who fails to live a good life in his family circle will certainly fail to live a good life in society .

Adjustment, a principle of life, is what makes all social life run smoothly . If you enter social life without first having learnt to make adjustments within the framework of the family , you will have only two options: either learn to make immediate adjustments or stoop to hypocrisy and then live in a state of tension.