We are all born idealists. We constantly seek higher ideals, the highest and best in all spheres. This idealistic approach sounds good in theory but is destructive in the long run. The reason is that we do not live our lives alone. Everyone’s interests, considerations, and choices vary. Everyone has a personal, unique view of what is good, bad, and ideal. Owing to this state of affairs, achieving the personal ideal is impossible. The only practical solution is to adopt the policy of adjustment with others.

In the present world, someone or the other is bound to ‘throw stones’ at you. If you react, you will get nothing but anger in return. However, if you curb any reaction on your part, you will have demonstrated certain very great things – the spirit of tolerance, the spirit of forgiveness, and the capacity to maintain your positivity even in adverse situations.

The sole method of having unity in this world is to live unitedly despite differences. It can be achieved only through patience and tolerance, virtues advocated by the Prophet of Islam.



This is a common complaint in joint families. In blood ties, when differences emerge, which is almost daily, are managed. But when the ties are not of blood, and differences emerge, then it is difficult to manage them. Marriage happens outside ties of blood.

Now in joint family, mother in-law and wife develop differences as difference is a part of life. Then, the wife would want that when she complains to the husband, the husband should side with her. When he is not able to do so, she develops feelings against them. In this case, the responsibility is 50-50. Both should think about the options they have - either they do not live in a joint family or if they do then they should know that this would happen and they must know how to handle it. Greater evil is to become emotional and not be ready to adjust as wherever you go, there will be some differences which will arise. Lesser evil is to be patient and adjust.


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